I’ll admit it’s getting way out of hand
Loving you from afar, that is
Lies have floated on my surface, my insides see-through.
Let it not be known by the crowd
Of all the time I nearly expose my being
Virtues had gone straight to the bin
Even my demons would think I’m…
A crimson kiss stained your rosy cheek
but I can’t tell if it’s hers or mine.
I prevailed and didn’t give it much thought,
let alone a fight
but it looked as if
it’d linger night after night.
Though I may never know who truly holds
that malign heart of yours
I’ll always long to hear its beats as
I fall further into my slumber
whilst sinking deeper into its pulse.
Your heartbeat will always be
the last puzzle piece
of why I am what I am
you, yourself, could never solve.
Even with her kiss on your cheek.
What is solace, if not love discreetly speaking?
Soundlessly reassuring in the bleakest of weather
with every word lingering through and through?
What is grief if not love persevering?
The unspoken guarantee that memories will prevail;
A promise to water the flowers each and every day.
What is decency if not love settling,
acceptance if not love slowly blooming,
What is anger if not love insulating
and disappointment if not love contradicting?
What value does everything hold
without the littlest atom of love, surrounding;
wrapped all tight in between?
You were adamant about tracing my existence
all the way to winter’s end.
You were willing to maunder if you must,
to relive the feeling you had
when you last kissed me goodnight.
You didn’t mind wandering the seven seas
with my warmth as your bearings
Sure; you fear the blue that…
Beneath all that flickering lights
The chiming euphoria of the night
Between the what-ifs that soon withers
and cruel intentions that occasionally slither
Beyond the tangled trees and shrieking cabin
Moonlight caught our fingers entwined,
Before long, the heartbeat becomes rattles
and our tides finally aligned.
Only then I’d dare to leave a kiss
Long enough to conjure another
Only then I’d risk myself to burn
To have her grace our altar.
But for now, I’m settled with waiting
for our very eyes to meet
whilst I admire her smile; the flickering glint of lust and mischief
what lies behind it.
We’d be lethal, you and I,
exceedingly harmful to our effects.
Our minds combined, we’d be the storm;
making the world sleep with one eye open.
We’d be fatal,
we’d make their state terminal
Our hearts coalesced; theirs wouldn’t stand a chance
We’d cease the beats and make them ours.
I care not for this feeling I’m having
albeit they’re beyond tiring, vibrantly consuming
I’d never end these thoughts, I swear
I guess they were always mine to store and hoard
We’d be deadly together, even when
we haven’t had the chance
to know each other
beyond our names.
I long for your footsteps on winter’s end;
your pace imprinted all the way to my entrance.
You land three knocks on the sill, peek inside,
and let yourself in through the opening.
You crept soundly through the lonely halls
and eventually, reaching my chamber.
You found me all curled…
I entered the room, and you were the centre
of the crowd willingly falling to your tale
you had your way with them, no doubt,
to enchant, to entertain, to leave them all impressed
You knew I came there for you,
yet I know not of what you were up to
It feels like broken clockwork
living in a state of disarray.
Our insides would soon freeze;
Weakly flickering, dying candlelight.
This winter truly is malign,
even made the air unbreathable
Hardly any food on the table,
What will I tell the children?
We seem lively but hardly alive;
living of our long-held breaths
We’ve ceased every wish
and pray it’d be worthwhile.
As we enter the long, relentless night
that dark, uncharted alleyway
Even when we’re no longer
those vibrant beings we’re known by
I’m glad it’s still you and me,
day by day.
Winter can mean so much to everyone.
Haunted in debt, chased by the past, even the actual weather.
Whatever it is, make sure you hold your loved ones tight and appreciate them for sticking by.
You may not have them the same tomorrow.